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Our Haiku Event
Haiku Event at Mr. B's
 learning about haiku at Mr. B's Emporium of Reading Delights with Alan Summers....We are pleased to publish some of the haiku that participants wrote with Alan's tutorial added. www.withwords.org.uk
Commentary on L's haiku - "hammock haiku"
hot face
a single cloud hangs
over the hammock
L’s two-line (phrase) part of the haiku are always smooth, so part of the haiku is already written straightaway, and it's just the one line
"fragment" that needs having the right words found. But “hot face” from what? The right one-line fragment will always add a lot more to the rest of the
poem then it should seem possible.
e.g.
red-faced
a single cloud hangs
over my hammock
This plays a nice game with the reader. They can read anything into this which is great for a haiku! It could even be simply an amazing sunset and you've seen the day out in your hammock. It doesn't actually have to statethat the cloud is red-faced from the sunset; or it is being embarrassed (which of course would be anthromorphism). It allows the reader to play with both the poem and “its” writer.
Overall really excellent drafts from L who was new to the haiku genre
before the workshop!
Alan Summers
Japan Times award-winning writer; Japanese Embassy 2009 "Japan-UK 150"
haiku & renga poet-in-residence; and With Words tutor/director:
www.withwords.org.uk
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